Chapter 6

 

Who Needs Missionary Member Care?

 

 

 

 

 

Short & Simple Summary

 

            The short answer is that all missionaries need some kind of member care.  However four centuries ago John Donne wrote, “No man is an island, entire of itself.  Each is a piece of the continent, a part of the main.”  Like everyone else missionaries are individuals; but when they are married and have children additional units are formed. These units may also need care.  In addition, missionaries are usually parts of teams with which they work closely, fields (often a region or county), and agencies.  These additional units may need care as well.  Here are the topics covered in the chapter.

 

Individuals

Married Couples

Families

Teams

Fields (regions, countries, etc.)

Agencies

 

If you want more detail and links to other sources, read on.

**********************

 

            In modern individualistic western cultures where people learn to “make it on their own,” even Christians may believe that they do not need help from anyone except God.  They may believe that asking for help is a sign of immaturity or weakness, a lack of faith or spirituality, or perhaps a symptom of illness—either mental or physical.   However, from the beginning of missions there have been few “Lone Rangers,” and even the Lone Ranger had Tonto, his national companion.  

Although some people do live in isolated areas and make it on their own, most people live with others.   Some missionaries, such as David Livingstone, have lived for long periods of time alone; however, nearly all missionaries need member care, at least the care that a colleague can give them.  For some that is enough, but others may need care from someone in the home office or someone from outside the agency.  Such member care may be given to one missionary at a time or in various groups.  Here are some examples of member care we have given along with links to helpful materials available on-line as well as recommendations for some of the best material available published printed material.

 

Individuals

 

            The most basic delivery of missionary member care is one person providing care for another individual.  The one-on-one face-to-face relationship is the most direct and personal one.  Helpful material is available online in the following two books.

·         What Missionaries Ought to Know:  A Handbook for Life and Service at http://www.missionarycare.com/ebook.htm#ought_to_know

·         Psychology for Missionaries at http://www.missionarycare.com/ebook.htm#psych  

            An excellent book available in print is Honourably Wounded:  Stress among Christian Workers (2001) by Marjory Foyle, published by Monarch Books (Oxford, UK and Grand Rapids, MI, USA).  For more information see http://www.missionarycare.com/dbFullArticle.asp?articleid=641.      Following are a variety of different “groups” of people that often need help as a unit.

 

Married Couples

 

            Shortly after delivering his well-known “To an Unknown God” sermon, Paul left Athens and went to Corinth.  There he met Aquila (native of Pontus) and his wife, Priscilla.  This married couple had recently evacuated from Italy because Claudius had ordered all Jews out of Rome (Acts 18:1-2).  After spending a year and a half working together in Corinth (Acts 18: 11), the three of them left for Syria, but Paul left Aquila and Priscilla in Ephesus (Acts 18: 19) where they discipled Apollos (Acts 18: 26).

            Moving often and living in a different culture puts a strain on the marriage relationship, a strain that takes many couples by surprise.  Of course, providing care for either the husband or the wife may help, but dealing with them both at the same time is much more effective because it can also deal with issues in their relationship itself.    Helpful information is available online in Missionary Marriage Issues at http://www.missionarycare.com/ebook.htm#marriage.

            The chapters of this book are available individually as brochures in pdf format that can be printed and given to couples. http://www.missionarycare.com/brochures.htm (right column).

            Finally, published printed information is available on marital issues at http://www.missionarycare.com/dbTopics.asp .  The links to “marital problems” and “women’s roles” are particularly relevant.

 

Families

 

            Young married couples serving as missionaries may have children in their homes, and that means another set of relationships to consider, those between parents and children living in the family.   Living in a culture that has different dynamics in the relationships between parents and children or adolescents may put a strain on a family in a host culture.  The following three books are written for parents.  The first is about missionary kids in general, the second about helping parents understand adolescents, and the third about helping children reenter their home culture.

·         Raising Resilient MKs: Resources for Caregivers, Parents, and Teachers at http://www.missionarycare.com/ebook.htm#resilient_mks

·         Understanding Adolescence at http://www.missionarycare.com/ebook.htm#adolescence

·         I Don’t Want to Go Home: Parent’s Guide for Reentry for Elementary Children at  http://www.missionarycare.com/ebook.htm#going_home

            Leslie Andrews edited The Family in Mission: Understanding and Caring for Those Who Serve (2004), and it was published by Mission Training International in Palmer Lake, CO.  This book includes not only information about the MK-CART/CORE family study, but also the boarding school study and the Adult MK study.  For more information about it see http://www.missionarycare.com/dbFullArticle.asp?articleid=816

            Finally, published printed information is available on family issues at http://www.missionarycare.com/dbTopics.asp .  The links to “family” and “dysfunctional families” are especially relevant.

 

Teams

 

            Neither Jesus nor the early church sent individuals out alone.  When Jesus sent the 12 disciples out, he sent them out two-by-two (Mark 6:7).  When he sent the 72 out ahead of him, he sent them two-by-two (Luke 10:1).  The church at Antioch sent Paul and Barnabas out as a team (Acts 13:1-3), and John joined them on Cyprus (Acts 13:5).  When Paul and Barnabas disagreed so sharply that they parted company, each chose another person to accompany him.  No one went alone. 

            A team is a group of missionaries who work together closely in the same city, the same institution, on the same project, etc.  Teams usually have an individual that is designated as the leader.  Married couples serve together by their own choice, but that is not always the case with other teams.  They may be appointed to work together by administrators who do not realize that some individuals may not work well together.  Even those who have chosen each other and worked for some time may develop disagreements like Paul and Barnabas did at the beginning of their second term of service.  Such team members may need member care to help resolve differences.  Perhaps a member care person could have helped prevent John’s premature departure or Paul and Barnabas parting company.

            Published printed information is available on team issues at http://www.missionarycare.com/dbTopics.asp .  The links to “leaders” and “team development” are relevant.

            Multicultural teams are special cases because they introduce at least one more culture to the mix.  If all the missionaries on a team are from the same sending country, two cultures are involved: the one from which the missionaries come and the host culture.  When missionaries from another country are added, even if they speak the same language as the other missionaries or the host culture, it increases the number of different cultures on the team.  This complicates things and may require someone from member care to sort out the differences.

LeAnne Roembke’s book, Building Credible Multicultural Teams is an excellent treatment of the issues.  For more information see http://www.missionarycare.com/dbFullArticle.asp?articleid=660.

 

Fields (regions, countries, etc.)

 

            Larger groups of missionaries that may not work closely together, may not live near each other, and may seldom see each other—but are all under a leader, often called the field director, make up a field.  This is a larger administrative area and may consist of a whole country, a major part of a country, or even several adjacent countries.  The teams on the same field may develop disagreements between cities, rural vs. urban missionaries, etc., and may need member care personnel to resolve them. 

            The early church apparently did not have “fields” but they did have missionaries in different countries and cities.  Note in the first five verses of Acts 18 we have the following missionaries in Corinth.

·         Paul from Athens (another city in Greece)

·         Aquila and Priscilla from Italy

·         Silas and Timothy from Macedonia

            These teams (they were from different passport countries) served there in Corinth for a year and a half together.

 

 

 

Agencies

 

            Sometimes an issue involves a whole mission agency.  This may be a systemic problem at the heart of the organization, it may be a theological issue that needs to be resolved, or it may be any other problem that involves everyone in the agency.  When this is the case the resolution may involve “turf wars” and the loss of personnel.  Such a situation occurred soon after Paul and Barnabas returned from their first term of service.

            They had returned to their sending church, reported what God had done with them, and spent time with the disciples there (Acts 14: 26-28).  Then some men came to Antioch and raised the question of circumcision being necessary for salvation.  The sending church could not resolve the issue, so they sent Paul, Barnabas, and some other believers to headquarters in Jerusalem.  They, along with some believers who were Pharisees, met with the apostles and the elders.  Here is the process they used to solve the dispute as described in Acts 15.

·         Give both sides a chance to present.  Paul and Barnabas presented their position, then allowed the Pharisees to present theirs (verses 5-11).

·         Give time for adequate discussion.  This was a crucial issue (salvation) so there was “much discussion” (verse 7).

·         Be quiet.  Note that “the whole assembly became silent” as they listened to the discussion.  Too often in such situations there is an undercurrent of whispering in the crowd (verse 12).

·         Listen. “They listened.” There is a big difference between being quiet and really listening.  Put yourself in the other’s place and really try to hear and understand what the other side is saying.  Too often we “turn them off,” let our minds wander, think about what we are going to say in reply, or just doze off in a long discussion (verse 12).

·         Allow others to finish.  “When they finished, James spoke up.” Do not interrupt until others have finished (verse 13).

·         Keep to the issue.  The issue here was whether or not circumcision was necessary for salvation.  Imagine all the other issues that could have been proposed from the books of the law!  Also discuss the issue, not personalities.

·         Express feelings appropriately.  There are no reports of verbal attacks or counterattacks during the discussion.

·         Apply scripture.  There may be differing interpretations, but certainly at least look at what the Bible has to say.  James quoted from Amos 9 (verses 15-18).

·         Propose a solution.  James said, “It is my judgement, therefore, that…” (verses 19-21).

·         Settle on essentials.  They all agreed on several items and wrote a letter. (verses 20-29).

·         Accept the decision.  When the delegation delivered the letter back to the church at Antioch, “The people read it and were glad for its encouraging message” (verses 31-32).

·         Reaffirm your friendship.  “After spending some time there” for fellowship, they were sent off “with the blessing of peace.” (verses 33-35).

            This process may work to solve the problem as it did there in Jerusalem.  However, a position may be so strongly held that it still does not work.  References to published printed information available about the agency are at http://www.missionarycare.com/dbTopics.asp.  The links to “agency responsibility,” “organization,” and “system” are relevant.

            When problems arise individuals may need care, but in addition to that, there may be marriage issues, family issues, team issues, field issues, and agency issues.  All of these need to be considered when providing missionary member care.

 

 

Note to the reader:  If you have suggestions about other things that would better answer this chapter’s question, please email those to me at ron@missionarycare.com.  In that email please tell me three things: (1) what you believe needs to be included, (2) links to relevant websites if available, and (3) how it better answers the question “Who needs missionary member care?”  I plan to periodically update and expand the book with these suggestions.

 

Addition by the author in 2016:

During the last decade people that I have never met wrote 3000 emails to www.missionarycare.com. After consulting several people about ethical issues, I compiled some of these into a 100-page book available from me at ron@missionarycare.com.  This book is for those serving in member care, so I am sending it to member care workers who request a copy rather than posting it on-line for the general public.  Please tell me if you would like it as a .pdf or .doc file for your computer or as a .mobi or .epub file for your e-reader.  Rather than reading what mental health professionals write about missionaries seeking help, read what missionaries say “in their own words.”   That book is now has the following 18 chapters, each with five to ten emails or parts of emails.

  1. Constrictive Criticism
  2. Cries for Help
  3. Critical Comments
  4. Database Issues
  5. Everyday Problems
  6. Financial Issues
  7. From Non-Missionaries
  8. General Requests
  9. Leadership Issues
  10. Marriage Issues
  11. National’s Requests
  12. Potential Member Care Providers
  13. Psychological Disorders
  14. Reentry Issues
  15. Singleness Issues
  16. Student Issues
  17. TCK Issues
  18. Thanks

ron@missionarycare.com.  pdf, doc, zip, mobi, or epub file.